Friday 7 February 2020

7/2/20 - Favourite Character Praise Friday WITH A TWIST: Ross Geller


Hello everyone! As today is the tenth instalment of Favourite Character Praise Friday since the conclusion of my hiatus, today is the next of many LEAST Favourite Character Praise Fridays. For those that are unfamiliar with me and my content, every ten weeks / five instalments of Favourite Character Praise Friday, I will diverge from my standard practice, where I pick apart my favourite characters and the ones I adore more than anything, so I can challenge myself and explore why the characters I loathe are also brilliant. You can always learn a lot from the characters you hate because they tend to be hated for a reason, and just because you don’t like them doesn’t mean that they’re not somebody else’s favourite character too. Despite finding it much harder to see the good in characters I hate, it is a lot of fun to pick a character apart.


So, who am I picking apart today?

A rather controversial character to dislike – Ross Geller from Friends, The TV Show!



Warning, the following will contains spoilers from all ten seasons of Friends!

Now, a disclaimer before I begin. Friends is a show that has been a part of my life since I was quite young. I remember watching it when I was like nine because it was on TV. I always really enjoyed watching it, and it was something I could just unwind and relax, watching, and let all of time just slip past me.

When I was fifteen, I was gifted with all ten seasons on DVD and I remember, when we moved house, the following week, we spent every waking moment of the day, watching friends on the TV. We burned through ten seasons in three weeks and were left, unsure of what to do with our lives in hindsight.

I have been watching it on-off, sometimes because it is the only thing on the TV that I’ll happily have on in the background. When compared to most other daytime TV shows, knowing there’s always the welcome comfort of Friends on hand was reassuring.

Even now, it occasionally goes on in the background, to provide a soundtrack to my day. It’s a familiar comfort when you live with anxiety, knowing that there’ll be a welcome distraction available if you just change the channel.

I’ll be the first to admit that, with all of this in mind, I probably do sound like slightly more than a casual fan. But I am the first to say that my interest in it has slowly fizzled out, just because I know what’s going to happen in every other episode, thanks to my childhood and early-teen years being fixated with these people and their amazing lives, and seeing how it all unfolds relatively easily for each of the characters.

So, before I start laying into Ross, in particular, I would like to acknowledge something. Because I have had similar discussions at university and it always seems to be brought up as a counter-argument:

Something that is really important is that character development is done subtly. This means that a casual viewer, that is watching the show our of order would still be able to recognise the character from its core traits. With Friends, considering how long the series has run, it would be impossible to completely stagnate the way the characters behave and interact, otherwise there is no way that the show would have been as successful and have run for so long, still being loved for twenty five years after its initial debut.

Character development in Friends was done through looking at parts of the characters and their relationships that would make sense to be stretched out. For example, the Ross and Rachel back and forth which took place consistently throughout the seasons, as well as how Monica and Chandler ended up in a relationship. The way that Chandler felt about Monica was discussed at as early as season three, where he began to make declarations that he would be her boyfriend if nobody else would. However, there were hints that they were quite close friends from the start of the show considering the way they interacted. Most of their banter toward the start consisted of jabs and jibes about their former relationships, particularly when they were single. There is always a small glimpser that there was a bit of romantic tension between them, and thus, at the end of season four, when Chandler and Monica sleep together, and any subsequent episode, you can see that their dynamic hasn’t changed too much, even though they are now in a romantic relationship. They still make comments about people they find attractive, even in the other’s company.

In short, sitcoms can’t have dramatic character development for the reason that they don’t want to detract the casual viewer from coming back to the show when they can, because the characters are so different.

This does, influence my perception of Ross’ character. It’s easy enough to criticise the way he is due to his lack of a capacity to change his behaviour, but if he was able to change that drastically, then it could impair the viewership. Changes with Ross, or any of the characters, were usually short-lived and took place within the space of one episode. Like when Ross made a New Year’s Resolution to do a new thing every day, and ended up changing up his image by buying a pair of leather pants. The same way that Chandler and Ross make a fifty-dollar-bet that he can’t go a without insulting his friends.

But, let’s get to the analysis.

Let’s start with why I dislike Ross. There are reasons why he’s in this segment instead of its partner.
I feel like Ross was one of those characters that could have been fantastic. You can see from the way he is quick to jump into new relationships that he struggles to validate himself, and, in a sense, does need someone there to reassure him that he’s on the right track, or doing the right thing. This is demonstrated from the get go in the immediate response to his marital breakdown with Carol. He expresses in Season One, that he felt that everything was okay, and that finding out that she didn’t agree and she couldn’t stay married to him was devastating. He couldn’t necessarily fault her in the sense of not wanting to try and make things work, which probably made things worse for him; after all she was cheating on him, and was in love with “the other woman”, Susan. After that point, he is struggles to pick himself back up. This is understandable, but for the sake of plot progression he quickly ends up fixating on the romantic feelings he once had for Rachel, who suddenly came back into his life. He let those emotions take over and when he eventually ended up with Rachel, he seemed a lot more stable in himself. Had the “we were on a break” thing not happened, I reckon that they would have stayed together for much longer. After all, Ross and Rachel’s relationship was incredibly strong at the start – with their arguments being real and easy to access as a consumer. However, TV drama and tension requires exaggerated reactions every once in a while, and thus the Ross and Rachel saga begins, from Season Three up until the Series Finale in Season Ten, they are constantly in a back and forth, trying to best each other, whilst not coping with their issues. The trait that is basically to his detriment is that desperation for validation that lead him to cheat on Rachel with the girl from the Copy Shop.

Another reason I dislike him is due to his character being presented as a serial monogamist, instead of his issues being handled properly. His divorce lawyer even makes quips about Ross being so quick to marry. It is shown in several instances that he has issues with commitment. He enjoys being married, he enjoyed the comfort and security of that relationship and has since ended up trapped in a cycle of it always being too soon, in one way, shape or form. When he married Emily, he hadn’t sorted out his issues with Rachel and ended up saying the wrong name at the altar. He ruins the opportunity to go onward and enjoy a happy life with her, because of this mistake and it is repeated several times for dramatic and comedic effects. Ross was still hung up on his breakup with Rachel when he got in a relationship with Emily and in his whirlwind romance, didn’t think of the consequences until Rachel was right there at his wedding, all of a sudden. Then, the second time he got married in the show, it was under even more dramatic circumstances. He and Rachel, his on-off romantic interest for several seasons got drunk in Las Vegas and ended up getting married. Ross is shown in many relationships between these marriages, never really taking time to enjoy life as a bachelor. Instead, he fixates on this blissful life he once had, that he once enjoyed and constantly strives to achieve it again. His fatal flaw is being so quick to commit to relationships and immediately wanting to spend his life with people, instead of giving himself the opportunity to adjust to the breakdown of one relationship. This wouldn’t be a problem, so to say, if his character wasn’t as fixated on commitment as he is. In short, instead of the sitcom focusing on the deeper problems, that could have still been poked fun at, Ross is just made out to be obsessed with marriage.

The last reason that makes me dislike Ross as a character is the way that he refuses to acknowledge his own hypocrisy. During Season Eight, when, after a one-night-stand, Rachel falls pregnant with Ross’ child. During her pregnancy, Ross resents Rachel for still having a romantic life, going to the lengths of hiding messages he took for her. Even though they didn’t discuss re-establishing their romantic relationship. However, during that period, Ross feels perfectly comfortable to start dating Mona for an extended period, during which, he neglects her own boundaries and constantly leaves her waiting for him when he won’t show up. Yet she is never shown to do the same thing back. Worst of all, in that period, he allowed Rachel to move in with him without telling her. Dishonesty, is a common trait of Ross’ character, where he will lie in order to deflect the severity of the situation he has found himself in. The fact that he never actively takes responsibility for the things he does is a negative character trait which is hard to find endearing as a viewer.

Of course, Ross, like all of the other characters, has reasons to be liked: he is diligent in the pursuit of his career, passionate enough about palaeontology to end up as a tenured professor at NYU, a distinguished position, despite his shortcoming in his role, like dating a student and not failing students because they claimed to be in love with him, he clearly did a good job and was very knowledgeable.

There are many things that I would love to discuss here about Ross, particularly with his issues. If I do end up making follow up posts, do expect to see them linked at the foot of this post!

Please, if you have opinions on Ross Geller, feel free to share them with me! Don’t forget you can check out my previous Character Praise by looking through the hashtags below.

And remember!

Per Aruda Ad Astra!

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